Joker King - find funny jokes from here.
Joker King - find funny jokes from here.
OZFox42 21 day.agoA single attendant was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travellers. Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said; "I have to be on this flight and it must be First Class." The attendant replied, "I'm sorry, sir. I'll be happy to assist you, but I've got to help these people first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "Do you have any idea who I am?" Without hesitating, the attendant smiled and grabbed her public address microphone and said: "May I have your attention please, may I have your attention please," she began - her voice heard clearly throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at Desk 5 who does not know who he is. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to Desk 5." With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the flight attendant, gritted his teeth and said, "Fuck you!" Unflinchingly, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to get in line for that too."
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A cannibble.
A square root.
It looks flushed.
Then I learned it was the fridge all along
Shovel07
Them: "I meant any questions about the job"
God [creates dolphin]: Welcome! You can speak, and this is the alphabet! Dolphin: What the FUCK is that? God: That's an "E", but you have over twenty... Dolphins: I shall use this one and only this one. God: What? Why? Dolphin: Eeeeeee
the hippocampus
Pete.
They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about. For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money totaling $25,000. He asked her about the contents. "When we were to be married," she said, "*my grandmother told me that the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily.*" The little old man was so moved, he had to fight back tears. Only two precious doilies were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He said, "But what about all of this money? How did you manage to save all this money?" "Oh," she said, "that's the money I made from selling the doilies."
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